Well the packers are done, and the truck comes tomorrow. I am at peace with this, even having some (dare I type it out loud) fun. Kahuna, (DH) had two boxes of paper to destroy so we spent the evening feeding wads of paper to the fire and chatting - it was very nice. I am looking forward to the next week at G-ma's house eating, visiting, catching up on Game of Thrones (we don't have cable only 17 channels at our house), it will be relaxing before the 5-7 days driving to Texas.
I hope to keep you posted as we travel.
Thursday, June 27, 2013
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Nervous energy
For the last year I have tried to find calm and balance in my life. I have put a good deal of energy into de-cluttering my physical space, which does help me to be calm. Then there was time at the gym, a strong body reassures the mind that the whole system is capable. I spent time meditating; free style, and guided by podcasts - I have really enjoyed Tara Brach and The Chopra Center for Wellbeing. Both are based on Buddhist teachings and I am trying hard to "take my hands off the controls". Yet, as we close in our our moving date the anxiety is daunting.
I am stressed by the unsold house, and the possibly forgotten things. I found myself standing in the kitchen wondering what to do, unable to sit down and breath. I have moved so many times before, ten times as an adult, five of those with the military, so I KNOW how to do this. As a matter of fact I have done it well, everything cleaned out and sorted; and I have done it badly, junk drawer not cleaned out, clothing not sorted, medicine cabinet uncleared. It is amazing how much junk you collect, and it can really piss you off to unwrap a huge rolled up item, carefully packed by the movers with the same amount of care they used on your china, to find a pile of bread bag ties. I learned the time spent on the front end (cleaning out) pays x3 when you are unpacking. I have also learned that the move happens bad/good/ugly it happens. If I forgot something, and lets face it the odds are good I did, it will still be okay. Working on a mantra - "there is nothing more to be done, it will all work out just as it should". Hmm, I think that will do. I will work with it and see if it helps me breath.
I am stressed by the unsold house, and the possibly forgotten things. I found myself standing in the kitchen wondering what to do, unable to sit down and breath. I have moved so many times before, ten times as an adult, five of those with the military, so I KNOW how to do this. As a matter of fact I have done it well, everything cleaned out and sorted; and I have done it badly, junk drawer not cleaned out, clothing not sorted, medicine cabinet uncleared. It is amazing how much junk you collect, and it can really piss you off to unwrap a huge rolled up item, carefully packed by the movers with the same amount of care they used on your china, to find a pile of bread bag ties. I learned the time spent on the front end (cleaning out) pays x3 when you are unpacking. I have also learned that the move happens bad/good/ugly it happens. If I forgot something, and lets face it the odds are good I did, it will still be okay. Working on a mantra - "there is nothing more to be done, it will all work out just as it should". Hmm, I think that will do. I will work with it and see if it helps me breath.
Friday, June 21, 2013
Updates . . .minimalism, balance, health
It has been awhile, and after I posted about the Beach and move I reviewed some old posts and thought I would make a few updates;
Reduce your stuff - This movement continues in our house and I have been very happy with the results. Here are some of the things I learned - return to that closet, I would clear out closets once a year but for me to go through them every few months I found some items I had 'saved' on the first check were easier to part with in 2 months. In some cases I realized that I didn't wear it over the season I had saved it for or it was just to far out of fashion, also with the weight loss I didn't want to give myself larger clothes to return to. I have also held to not buying any clothing with out throw out something. Since we have a moving bearing down on us I have also cleared out all junk drawers and book shelves. I found alot of stuff in bathroom cupboards - it was all tossed for the move and we have been using up all the sample sized shampoos and body washes that were lingering in the house. Sometimes I have some anxiety about throwing stuff out - I want to recycle, or re-purpose as much as possible - and I have tried that but I also let myself off the 'save-the-planet' hook by remembering that I am also trying to reduce my overall consumption. To that end I have become the bag lady -- rarely needing a store plastic bag when I shop. So a big pat on the back on minimizing my environment.
Balance - with less stuff cluttering up the house cleaning became less of a burden it also helped that the house is for sale so the whole family is pitching in full force to keep it show room perfect. I often remind the family that we should get to a point where we live like this all the time. With the house cleaner I can actually relax in my home and read a book guilt free - AHHH BLISSFUL!!! I still make it to the gym 3x a week, and I worked part time yet I was at peace it was really nice.
Weight loss - I still get to the gym and I watch what I eat (but I am not tracking like I should) so, while I have not gained my loss has slowed considerably. I am ok with this since I feel like it is my life and I should be enjoying it and living it not just always working toward a goal. My health is continuing to improve and I am still in a much better physical place than I was 18 months ago so while I have missed goals the continued progress is acceptable to me.
Overall I think I am in a good place with some tools to maintain my balance, health and good outlook.
Reduce your stuff - This movement continues in our house and I have been very happy with the results. Here are some of the things I learned - return to that closet, I would clear out closets once a year but for me to go through them every few months I found some items I had 'saved' on the first check were easier to part with in 2 months. In some cases I realized that I didn't wear it over the season I had saved it for or it was just to far out of fashion, also with the weight loss I didn't want to give myself larger clothes to return to. I have also held to not buying any clothing with out throw out something. Since we have a moving bearing down on us I have also cleared out all junk drawers and book shelves. I found alot of stuff in bathroom cupboards - it was all tossed for the move and we have been using up all the sample sized shampoos and body washes that were lingering in the house. Sometimes I have some anxiety about throwing stuff out - I want to recycle, or re-purpose as much as possible - and I have tried that but I also let myself off the 'save-the-planet' hook by remembering that I am also trying to reduce my overall consumption. To that end I have become the bag lady -- rarely needing a store plastic bag when I shop. So a big pat on the back on minimizing my environment.
Balance - with less stuff cluttering up the house cleaning became less of a burden it also helped that the house is for sale so the whole family is pitching in full force to keep it show room perfect. I often remind the family that we should get to a point where we live like this all the time. With the house cleaner I can actually relax in my home and read a book guilt free - AHHH BLISSFUL!!! I still make it to the gym 3x a week, and I worked part time yet I was at peace it was really nice.
Weight loss - I still get to the gym and I watch what I eat (but I am not tracking like I should) so, while I have not gained my loss has slowed considerably. I am ok with this since I feel like it is my life and I should be enjoying it and living it not just always working toward a goal. My health is continuing to improve and I am still in a much better physical place than I was 18 months ago so while I have missed goals the continued progress is acceptable to me.
Overall I think I am in a good place with some tools to maintain my balance, health and good outlook.
The Beach Before the Move
I am here at the beach for the summer solstice, we are on our family vacation and I had not even taken note that the solstice would happen. It is sad that I lose track of my spirituality and it is wonderful to me that I am on the beach with the full moon coming on such a powerful night.
I need to take this night to meditate and refocus my mind - there is so much going on - we are moving from North Carolina to Texas, our home is for sale, and we don't know yet where we will actually live in Texas. Sometimes the fear and stress of the move really bothers me, other times I am excited by the adventure. We have really liked Fayetteville, the kids and I have enjoyed it here and found our place. I am very comfortable even if I don't have any true friends, I do have many acquaintances. We love our home, and like the schools. AND I had a job which I enjoyed. SO it is bitter sweet to move, while there are things I wanted and didn't have here there are many things I did have and giving them up is worrisome.
I have found a hiking group in Texas, and a study group to join. We will only be there for 10 months so I can take the time to focus on smaller projects and not get involved in planting a garden, or finding a job (although if the house doesn't sell I might be working at Walmart). It might be a time for me to figure out what I want to be when I grow up, LOL.
I need to take this night to meditate and refocus my mind - there is so much going on - we are moving from North Carolina to Texas, our home is for sale, and we don't know yet where we will actually live in Texas. Sometimes the fear and stress of the move really bothers me, other times I am excited by the adventure. We have really liked Fayetteville, the kids and I have enjoyed it here and found our place. I am very comfortable even if I don't have any true friends, I do have many acquaintances. We love our home, and like the schools. AND I had a job which I enjoyed. SO it is bitter sweet to move, while there are things I wanted and didn't have here there are many things I did have and giving them up is worrisome.
I have found a hiking group in Texas, and a study group to join. We will only be there for 10 months so I can take the time to focus on smaller projects and not get involved in planting a garden, or finding a job (although if the house doesn't sell I might be working at Walmart). It might be a time for me to figure out what I want to be when I grow up, LOL.
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